On Drunk Stories...

Why does everybody need to share their drinking stories with me, or anyone else for that matter? This is something that I find extremely annoying, and dumb. Some people come up to you and say "man, we got so trashed last night, it wasn't even funny." Then they start bragging at the amount of drinks they downed, "I had like 6 beers, 4 shots of tequila, 2 shots of Vodka… and then Joe came by with a huge bottle of rum, which we finished just between the two of us… It was freakin' awesome!" Is it really? I think you're a loser who wants to justify that you're cool, by telling me that you party hard. I'm saying ‘he’ here, but there are a lot of she's who shared similar stories with me.

It doesn’t stop there. People also give details of how their head was in the toilet all night, and how they fell down the stairs, and how they puked on the lawn, and how they made out with a chick who was so ugly she might have been a guy. All those stories are said with a sense of pride. Like these losers actually achieved something! And there’s always the confused guy who says “oh so that’s what happened that night.. I can’t remember I was totally hammered”

But, as FunkMaster Flex says “be clear” I have no problem with people getting smashed, just don’t tell me about it. I hate to waste precious minutes of my life hearing such mind numbing crap.

I will finish this post with a mini Lingo Lesson including commonly used synonyms of the word “drunk”
- trashed - shit faced - smashed - hammered

Technorati Tags: drunk, drinking, beer, stories, society, bragging, loser, alcohol

The Evolution of Love

In the survival show post, I noted how amazed I was at seeing how far parents will go to ensure their children’s survival. This ‘phenomenon’ can be easily attributed to the love between parent and child, a love that we as being natural.

But why is it so natural? Why is it that in a time of life and death we choose to lag behind and save those close to us? I’m going to attempt to answer these questions in this post.

Like many simple explanations, this one will make use of the theory of evolution. Survival boils down to the ability of species to reproduce. But reproduction alone is not enough for survival. The offspring of the species must survive, at least long enough to be able to reproduce as well. Otherwise the circle of life would not be completed. The offspring of some species are able to survive on their own at the moment of birth, and as well know humans don’t belong to that category. Instead, newly born humans need at least 4 years of care to have the slightest chance of survival. In my opinion, the early humans who took great care of their babies, protected them, fed them, and fought for them, were able to pass their genes much more successfully than the ones who neglected their children. So nature automatically sorted humans with the “care and love” gene from the ones with “neglect” gene. Through storms, predator attacks, and all other dangers that early humans had to endure, the ones who were more loving and caring (as we would say these days), were the ones who provided their offspring the opportunity to grow up and reproduce. And so the love and care genes got passed down the line making it’s way to present day humans.

Looking at the survival show mentioned earlier from this new perspective, you will now hopefully see that the parents of the baby, were, more or less, programmed to sacrifice for their baby. The “care” and “love” we recognize are nothing but unconscious attempts at survival. Survival cave man style ;) That was deeeep wasn’t it?

Technorati Tags: evolution, science, love, survival, darwin

Can't I just get an oil change?

My car was 50 KM overdue for an oil change, so during my lunch hour I hopped to the closest Jiffy Lube for some fresh lubricant. So I go straight in, the guy there directs to the proper place, and jumps to open my door. Next thing I know he’s firing his memorized “ hi sir, are you here for our ‘signature service Quaker State’ oil change, or would you rather get the 100 K 5W30 oil this time”.

What? Is he trying to confuse me with letter-number combinations to the point where I’ll say “me no get it, you change thing” Well, I wasn’t going to give up that easily. I said to him “so what does the 100K oil do?” He says “it’s for cars with mileage over 100K.” Hmm, that explains it. At this point I’m starting to get skeptical here, so I say “no thanks I’ll stick to just regular oil this time.” A disappointed look was showing on his face.

So they start pumping oil in, and they start on their 10 billion point “inspection.” Then, what seems to be the manager comes up to me and says “we checked under the hood and everything looks good, except…” (I start thinking to my self, here we go again) “we noticed an oil leak, possibly caused by worn gaskets. He continues, "for $9.99 we can add a sealant to your engine which ‘could’ fix the problem.” I tell him “I’m going to get a tune-up soon, and I’ll have my mechanic look at it” (not a lie BTW). The dude doesn’t give up “but the mechanic will probably replace the gaskets and that will be a few hundred dollars.”

At this point I’m thinking, get off my ass and change the damn oil! Holy crap, can a person get his oil changed without mechanical advice from a high school dropout?! But instead of saying that I told the guy “I appreciate the advice, but I’d rather try a more permanent solution to the problem” (assuming it exists). At this point you think he’ll stop right? WRONG.

He then pulls out his last weapon and starts again "this is a chart showing the regular maintenance recommended by Honda, and the industry standard. As you can see they recommend changing the transmission oil every 48,000, the fuel filter…blah blah blah". Then randomly “Oh look at that, looks like you fuel filter hasn’t been changed in a while.” At this point I’m probably unconsciously making a “shut the hell up” face. He looks at me and says “Well I’ll jot down the prices anyway just so you could think about it.” How nice of him to do that. So I tell him “I’ll make sure I’ll have my mechanic look under the hood, and change whatever needs to be changed. He works at Honda and he’s my buddy, so I trust him with my car.” He makes another disappointed face. Well, I’ll take care of your purchase for you. A minute later, he courteously opens the door for me and I drive off.

I have changed my oil numerous times, but I was never hassled that much before. It really pissed me off. According to Mr. Lube my car is so bad, it’s almost unsafe to drive and might blow up at any moment. I’m all about preventive and non preventive maintenance but not done by a guy who changes oil. When I want to get a repair done, I’ll ask a professional for help, not a grease monkey who spent 4 seconds looking at my car. Sheesh!

Technorati Tags: oil change, maintinance, car, lubricant, jiffy lube, annoying, salesman

The Best Survival Show on TV

Last Sunday on Discovery channel I watched the best survival show I have ever seen, called “I shouldn’t be alive.” I saw two different stories, one of them was a story of a family of three, husband, wife, and young baby stuck in the snow in the middle of nowhere. While driving to a funeral, the family decided to take a direct route through Nevada. On the way a massive snow storm hit them, and they found themselves stuck in the snow, on a road in the middle of a national park. Instead of staying in the car, and waiting for a search and rescue mission to find them, the couple decided to walk across the snow in search for a suspected road. After a 12 hour walk, and two days without food, the couple realized they were walking in the wrong direction.

Due to extremely cold temperature, the mother’s feet literally froze, and she was unable to walk one step. The father found a small cave where he told his wife to wait there for him and take care of the baby, while he left them to search for help. The father walked through the night back to the truck, rested there, and then kept on walking without rest, reaching the point of hallucination, when suddenly he found a truck on a snow covered road. With whatever energy he had left, he ran and yelled after it, and fortunately the truck driver saw him and took him home.

Soon after the father found help, the mother and baby were recovered from the cave. After being hospitalized, the toes of the mother and father had to be amputated, due the extreme temperatures they were exposed to. The baby suffered no injuries, since he was kept in a sleeping bag the whole time nice and warm.

What amazed me most was how much both parents sacrificed to keep the baby alive. At one point the baby stopped crying and both parents feared he was dead, the mother remarked “If my baby would have died, I would have given up trying to find a way out… my only concern was the baby,” to which the husband agreed. I found it particularly amazing that the mother and father were unselfish during this life and death situation. You’ll probably say love is what kept them together as a family, both working for a common unselfish goal - surviving together. What’s my take on this seemingly amazing unselfishness? Well that will have to wait for the next post…

For more about the amazing show visit this

Extensive Experience

The other day I was doing some online research when I came across this company. I was impressed by their experience and I thought I would share with you a snapshot of their profile. Notice anything odd about the company profile?

Office Talk

You know what show is awesome? The Office, haven’t seen the American version yet, but the British version is great. The Office, along with Office Space, are the best depiction of the type of people, and behaviour people that work in offices see everyday.

Part of what makes an office is “office talk,” which is made up of typical phrases, or conversation starters that seem to be repeated in every office. I’ll give you an example. The other day I walked into the washroom to see a person looking in the mirror, yawning with arms stretched wide. I myself yawn all the time, and I expect people to yawn as well. This person though, felt like he had to explain why he was yawning by saying (a very typical office phrase) “Ahh, it’s sleepy Monday”. I’m usually not an ass, but I smiled and said “Today’s actually Tuesday”. He then replied saying (another typical phrase) “Oh yeah, time passes by so fast.”

On another occasion, this past week I was called to the manager’s office where he said “We need you to make a presentation for a meeting next week…” and then he added the typical “and you have an hour to do it”… And who can forget the greetings? My desk happens to be near the end of the office. The office is a narrow design, so I have to go past everybody every morning. It takes me roughly 5 “good mornings” to get from the door to the desk. But I really can’t complain, it’s nice to hear a good morning and see a smile in the morning.

It’s also widely known that Mondays are sleepy and Fridays are happy (and sleepy on some occasions). Speaking of those two days, people, including myself tend to use these days as an excuse to working sloppily. On Monday, you’re expected to be tired from the weekend, and on Friday you’re expected to be worn out since it’s the end of the week. In fact the MFS (Monday/Friday syndrome) is so popular, people don’t even need to explain. For instance, someone will screw up and simply say “Ah it’s Monday.” No further explanation is needed, and that’s sweet. So really if you look at it there are only three days where you can’t complain. Wait...I’m digressing.

Back to office talk, there are two phrases that I can think of right now, that I’ve always wanted to say. The first is “I want this report on my desk tomorrow morning” and the other is the golden phrase “Let’s do lunch.” To me, “let’s do lunch” is the epitome of office talk. There’s the more inferior “Let’s discuss this over lunch” but that one has too many words, and it gives the impression that you have nothing else to do. “Let’s do lunch” is straight forward and quick. It’s demanding and yet professional, authoritative and yet respectful. It is golden. So go out there and practice your office talk, you never know when you’re going to be using it next.

Dollars and Cents - Solution to today's stupid economy

Who hasn’t heard any of these?

Back in the day bread cost 50 cents.

I used to buy two pairs of shoes for 10 dollars.

In the fifties a shirt was 5 pounds.

We used to be able to buy a car for 500 dollars. And the list goes on….

At the same time, people also say, I used to get paid 50 cents an hour, or my monthly salary was 10 pounds. Obviously there’s a longing for the past where people used to buy things for a small amount of money. I say, bring the future to the past and introduce deflation. I’m sick of hearing about the economic bubble, and higher prices. I want to hear about deflation. I want to say to my kids, back in the day the price of a house was 100,000 but thanks to Daddy’s idea now it’s 2.50.

Of course I’m not only talking about deflating prices, I also want to deflate wages. Just think of the tax on your deflated pay check. It will no longer be in the hundreds of dollars, but rather fractions of cents. There are some true benefits to deflation, that economists have failed to realize. Let me explain. A brand new TV costs 1000 dollars, but wouldn’t it be more attractive if it was only $5? Even though you’re getting paid less, a $5 TV will still feel like a bargain. Thus, deflation will create a surge of money spending which will directly stimulate the economy. Huh? Huh? How am I with you so far?

And how about those credit cards? Wouldn’t it be great if you could give your daughter you credit card to go shopping knowing she won’t spend more than 7.50 since that’s the cards limit?

Deflation is also environmentally friendly. If I were to walk on the street I can easily collect 10 pennies just from scanning the road. People lost touch with the value of the penny. That innocent copper coin is viewed today as a nuisance rather than valuable currency. People don’t even bother picking up pennies when they drop them. Meanwhile, we keep cranking away making more pennies, and wasting precious copper. With deflation, people will pick up pennies when they drop them, hell, they’ll even look for pennies on the road. Deflation will help us bring back the good ol’ days where a penny made a difference. Saving natural resources is environmentally friendly, deflation is environmentally friendly.

So what are we waiting for? We can stimulate the economy, save the environment, and get a false sense of cheapness. Let’s get deflating.

Technorati Tags: economy, deflation, prices, sarcasm

SpongeBob Squarepants has landed..

In a landmark visit to Canada, SpongeBob SquarePants and his crew arrived today at Fairview Mall. The famous figure was greeted by hundreds of kids lining up for over 2 hours just to take a picture with him. My brother was onsite covering this historic visit, sadly though he was too far back in line couldn’t take a picture. Dora the explorer was also present, but apparently she was PMSing and refused to talk to the kids.

Observations From a Manufacturing Facility

Before I started work this term I didn’t know what to expect to see. This was my first job in the manufacturing sector, and I was looking forward to seeing the dynamic of the industry. The company I work at specializes in designing and manufacturing plastic components for the automotive industry, which means it’s a fast paced high output facility. In this post I will tell you about some of my observations of working at a manufacturing facility.

The first thing that struck me as I was walking around the plant for the first time was the number of women that work there. Since it’s a factory, I expected to see a lot of men on the floor. Since, although stereotypical, I associate factory employees with men. I estimate that 90% of the people on the floor are women. Their job doesn’t require any heavy lifting or strenuous work and this may be the reason behind the large number of women. One engineer casually mentioned to me that women are proven to have better hand-eye coordination, and since most of their work is assembly related they make a perfect match with the job.

The second thing that I noticed was the number of robots in the plant. Every injection moulding machine has a robot on top of it, which grabs the newly moulded part and places on a conveyor belt. I had taken a “Technology and Society” course in university, and one of the aspects we discussed was the replacement of humans with robots. This was seen as a bad thing since it decreased the number of jobs, and hence created unemployment. Personally, I don’t think this theory applies to where I work, for reasons beyond the scope of this post.

What amazed me most was the paint robot. The robot is programmed to go through a certain pattern of paint strokes for every part. Paint robots have 6 degrees of freedom (just imagine your arm from shoulder to hand), which means they can mimic human arm movements. The fluidity of the movement, and mind boggling quickness of its painting, leaves me stunned every time I see it working. In fact, the first time I saw the robot in the paint booth, I thought it was the actual person, but the inhuman speed of the movement gave it away.

Lastly, one aspect that makes me appreciate the manufacturing industry is the logistics. Making sure customers get their parts on time, in perfect condition, is not an easy task. You need enough people on site, backup machinery, maintenance crew on hand, material buffers, shipping and handling crew, and the list goes on. Hundreds of operators, supervisors, and engineers work together to make sure all problems are solved quickly and efficiently. Seeing the operation of the plan reminded of a book that I read a few years ago called “Emergence.” In a nutshell Emergence discusses how simple communication through feedback loops creates an emergence of seemingly higher (collective) intelligence, turning simple single unit behaviour into complex collective behaviour. There’s no better example of the emergence of higher intelligence than that of a manufacturing plant.

Technorati Tags: manufacturing, plant, factory, plastics, plastic, injection moulding, women, robots, industry, observations, technology

How to rank #1 on Google..

As I was going through my daily blog stat check I saw this very interesting search inquiry that lead to my blog. Seen in the picture above the inquiry reads "who set the world's record for the loudest fart" It just shows that posting original, and sometimes disgusting ideas can lead to a pretty good rank on Google. I'm glad to see "Earth to Omar" associated with such great topics :-|
But seriously now, someone acually cares about that? Were they planning to break the record? That's one record breaking event I wouldn't want to attend..

In other news, as you can tell already this blog now supports a new theme... I made up this banner a long time ago, and the majority of the readers liked it. So I decided to finally use since after all a new season is on our door steps, and what better way to celebrate spring but with a fresh theme.

Going back to blog stats, I have been noticing hits coming from www.syplanet.com which seems to be a new Syrian blog aggregator. I like the look and functionality of the website, all we need is a nifty little button to show off.

The Cost of a Canadian Education Just Got Higher

Today the tuition freeze set by the Liberal party 2 years ago was lifted by the ministry of Ontario's colleges and universities. Beginning next fall tuitions across Ontario will see an average rise of 5% for science and arts programs, and 8% for professional programs. Engineering, medicine, law and accounting are all classified under “professional programs.”

Allow me to give you an inside look into the amount of money spent by and engineering undergrad. When I entered university the tuition was roughly $4200 per term, which means you had to pay $8400 per school year, not including books, food, residence, parking etc. If you do the math you will find out that I will be paying roughly $10,000 for my last year with the new increase. And I’m actually quite lucky. Why you ask? Well I don’t have to live on residence and my program has an incorporated cooperative education program, which lets us work between school terms. But what about the other students? How will they be able to afford an education this expensive? I personally haven’t seen a 5% wage increase for working students over the years, and figures published yearly by the university support my observations. Furthermore, coop students are pretty much denied any OSAP funding (an interest free loan while you study) since they are seen as being well off by the university. So combining an 8% increase in tuition payment, with a constant income, and minus any financial assistance, shows how screwed some of us will be in the upcoming years.

The province calls this new move the “reaching higher” plan. In response to that Jesse Greener, Ontario Federation of Students Spokesman said " [this plan is] reaching for higher tuition fees, reaching for higher debt," in a press conference today. In 2004 the Ontario Undergraduate Student Alliance published a report saying “the average student debt from government loans among graduates was $21,700 in Ontario, well above the national average of $18,900. This represents a doubling of debt over the past decade. At the same time, public support to manage debt has been reduced. Over the past nine years, the average amount of a provincial grant has declined 62.9%” That was of course during the tuition freeze, things are only going to get worse.

Here are where things don’t make sense to me the most. The Ontario government has been whining and complaining about the 50% dropout rate of high school students. How does a tuition increase encourage high school students to pursue higher education? On another note, according to Stats Canada, 2005 saw “Canada's federal, provincial, territorial, and local governments (as well as the two major pension plans) record a combined surplus of $12.1 billion.” Where’s the funding into Canada’s future? It’s a cliché phrase but investing into universities is an investment into Canada’s future.

The government isn’t the only one to blame. I blame university students for not putting their right to vote to good use. The day of the election I went to a public lecture at Waterloo where the speaker asked the audience (composed of university students) “so who voted today?” I only saw a few hands go up. We’re throwing away our political power by our lack of interest and knowledge. I hope this is a wake up call for all those who didn’t vote.

Technorati Tags: canada, ontario, university, college, tuition, tuition increase, education, debt, student loan, Vote, Voting, Students

On reading multiple books, and visiting the doctor

About a week or two ago I got a book which I’ve been waiting to read for a long time, 1984. When I got the book, I was still in the process of finishing off ‘Tis, so I couldn’t start reading it right away.

So on Friday I started 1984, and my initial reaction was “wow, this books is sweet!” But before I got too far in the book, my “bestest” friend got me The Davinci Code. Me being me, I couldn’t help it but read the first few pages of Davinci, and that was all it took to draw me in. Plus while watching the Oscars, there was a commercial for the Davinci Code movie coming out in May, giving me more reason to the read the book first. I have tried reading two books at once before, but things got a bit confusing, so I wont try that this time.

So it looks like a reading filled time for me.

On another note, today I visited the family doctor to get his opinion on my injured shins. So while waiting for my name to be called I picked up Time magazine and began looking through it, pausing after reading an article on poverty to think “what a great country I live in!” For instance to see the doctor today all I needed was a little plastic card with my name on it. I didn’t pay a single penny to get his consultation.

Anyway, while waiting for my medicine the guy next to me was coughing loudly and that got on my nerves. His coughing isn’t what got on my nerves but rather, what he was using to cover his mouth (the odd time that he actually covered his mouth). He was using the same magazine I was reading earlier. I couldn’t help but visualize what will happen next. More patients will come in, they will pick up the magazine and they’ll leave the doctor’s office with yet another sickness. Sheesh!

Tag 5 - Not Exactly As Shown

Omar may not be exactly as shown... but pretty damn close (see below)

Q: Who’s the 4th person on your received call list?
A: Chris

Q: What’s your main ringtone on your phone?
A: Continental (just a classic ring

Q: What were you doing at midnight last night?
A: Talking to some guests that were over

Q: What did the last text message on your cell phone say
A: New offer from Rogers wireless……

Q: Whose bed did you sleep in last night?
A: My own

Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
A: White

Q: Most recent movie that you watched?
A: I re-watched Wedding Crashers

Q: Name 3 things that you have on you at all times?
A: Wallet, keys, cell

Q: What's the color of your bedsheets?
A: Navy blue

Q: How much cash do you have on you right now?
A: $40.

Q: What is your favorite part of the chicken?
A: Breast.

Q: What's your favorite town/city?
A: Montreal.

Q: I can't wait to (til)...?
A: I visit Syria.

Q: When was the last time you saw your mom?
A: 10 minutes ago.

Q: When was the last time you saw your dad?
A: 1 hour ago.

Q: When was the last time you talked to them?
A: Mom: 1 hour ago, Dad: 1 hour ago.

Q: What did you have for dinner last night?
A: kousa ou bitinjan ma7shi.

Q: How long have you been at your current job?
A: 2 months.

Q: Look to your left. What's there?
A: a bookcase and a printer, and a huge mess of stuff including anything from headphones to a calcluator.

Q: Who is the last person you spent over $50 on?
A: Some kid in Africa.

Q: Whats the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?
A: socks, after a water fight at university (I never returned them :D)

Q: What website(s) do you visit the most during the day?
A: Google.

Q: Do you have an air freshener in your car?
A: Two, one soccer ball and one of those maple leafs. The soccer ball is mainly for looks, since it died 10 minutes after I opened it

Q: Do you have plants in your room?
A: No but I’d like some.

Q: Does anything hurt on your body right now?
A: Yes, my shins, forehead and wrist, all from yesterday’s soccer game.

Q: What city was your last taxi cab ride in?
A: Mississauga, and the guy floored it !!

Q: Do you own a camera phone?
A: Yes

Q: What's your favorite starbucks drink?
A: Never been there, but generally speaking, cappuccino

Q: Recent time you were really upset?
A: last weekend.

Q: Have you been in love with anyone?
A: you know it

Q: Who do you think will repost this?
A: No one, hopefully

Tagging Queenie, Jinan, and Sinan

Omar, exactly as shown ( I don't tan my face)

3enak, 3enak!

Said regarding the closure policy adopted by Israel in retaliation against Hamas being elected..
"[The clossure policy] is to put the Palestinians on a diet but not make them die of hunger."

- Dov Weisglass

For more about the current situation in Gaza city visit here

Quick Update and Commerical Bashing

Oh boy, so we’ll start with some breaking news, and then move on to commercial criticism…

First of all, I’m going to have less time to blog since I have decided to enter a design competition. I contacted some of the people I know/worked with at my previous coop job and so far we have a team of 4. The project involves the design of a sustainable/energy efficient community in a city in British Columbia. The main objective behind the design is to make the buildings, houses, schools in the area as energy efficient and environmentally friendly as possible, by using new technologies and innovative ideas. I didn’t know about the competition until a week ago, so we’re already 2 months behind, and we have 3 months to complete the design. So I will be concentrating my efforts during my free time on this project. The project is definitely a challenge since it’s geared towards civil engineers, and architects rather than mechanical engineers, so my main focus on this project will be to come up with some crazy ideas to save energy, and use renewable resources. BTW if you’re an architecture student and want to join comment or drop an e-mail..

Second, time is running out on getting an answer back whether I can leave work 2 weeks early or not. I wanted to take the last 2 weeks off, and combine that period with the week off I normally get between school and work and go to on a trip to Syria. So far the chances are looking slim. So if the trip doesn’t work out for the spring, then the end of the summer is the next best opportunity.

Third, I just watched this cheesy A&W (fast food place) commercial. How far are these guys pushing the importance of A&W in family traditions?? Before I describe the commercial, I’ll fill you in on some details. A&W offers a “line” of burgers named after family members, so you have the Papa burger, the Momma burger, Teen Burger, Grandpa… you get the point. So here’s the commercial in simple and straight to the point language:

Son and wife visit Son’s parents. Son, his Wife, mother and father in law decide to go out to eat. They go to A&W. Son explains that it’s a family tradition. The father in law makes the order “A papa burger, a momma burger, and two teens.” Son lingers behind to wait for the burgers while parents and wife sit. Son gets food tray. Father in law starts unwrapping the burger, only to notice that it’s a GRANDPA burger. They all start hugging in the middle of the restaurant.

Ok, so this is where the viewer has to use some brain power, and put two and two together. Get it? The son and his wife are having a baby, hence the Grandpa burger. Awww isn’t that the best way to tell your dad he will be a grandfather. Screw Hallmark! From now on it’s “A&W burger wrappers says it best.”

Ironically enough there’s one major similarity between the commercial and the grandpa burger they’re both filled with Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!

That being said, I like their root beer.